If I Could Just Name Names ...

One of the things that holds me hostage in this little undertaking is that I'm bound not to name names. Where's the fun in that? There are people who irritate me to the point where I would dearly LOVE, nay NEED to share their personal information with the internets; yet I'm not allowed. In fact to do so would get me in a big ol' heap of warm, steaming trouble. So I sit on my hands, sigh mightily, and hope against hope that it won't drive me to violence  ~ certain things just piss me the hell off.

Again, this requires a back story.

I am currently enrolled in an Outpatient Program for the Nutty. While I don't find I'm learning all that much from this program, what it does is keep me within their sites without putting me inside full-time. This is a MUCH cheaper way for my insurance to keep their hands clean.  During this Outpatient Program, I spend various parts of my day in different "classes," learning how to "cope" (notice all the quotation marks? That's intentional). Some classes are meant for me to "process." I'm not fond of processing, as I've never been one to bring all my shit out in public and let my intestines lay there for people to root around in. I'd rather do that in a therapist's office. However, it makes the Group Leaders MUCH happier if you participate. 

It all sounds cool enough, right? Yeah, you'd think so. Except that there are anywhere from 12 - 20 people in that room, and a good portion of them would like to speak. Some of them would like to actually "process." My irritation? The ones who interrupt the entire procedure by asking the Group Leaders personal questions in the middle of someone's rant! WTF? Talk about lack of boundaries. Now I get that the lack of boundaries is going to be an issue simply by virtue of where we are. Lets face it: we are NOT the best at maintaining any sort of parameters.  But the amount of personal crap that gets drawn into the discussions is ludicrous! Let me give you an example:

Skinny Basketball Player to Group Leader 1: "How is your microbiology class going? What did you get on your last exam? Have you figured out how to .... ? When is your wife going back to work? How is she feeling? How did the surgery go?" 

Skinny Basketball Player to Group Leader 2: "How did Fido react when you picked him up from the doggy hotel? Was he pissed? How was your weekend away? What did you do? Does your dog ...... "

You might notice that there's a common thread there; yeah, there is. And the irritation that these disruptions cause is SO annoying because these classes only last 45 minutes ~ and you better believe that when that 45 minutes is up, those people (Skinny Basketball Player included) are up and running for the door to make sure they get their full 15 minute smoke break.

Is that my only complaint? Noooo. How about standing up two minutes before the group ends and just .... standing there? Someone is talking something out: they've been raped, beaten, abused in some heinous manner, and another shithead is so self-centered that he/she has to stand there for the last two minutes because they're concerned that the class might run over by a minute or two. Yeah, we're here to help you process, just so long as it doesn't cut into my cigarette time.

Or we'll eat potato chips, chew ice chips, pop gum, pour drinks, and walk in and out of the class repeatedly ~ and my own personal favourite: sleep. Sleep to the point of SNORING. Yeah, I really love that one. Nothing says "I care" like a wide-mouthed, softly-snoring buddy. 

I don't get it. Maybe next time I'll talk about how *I* shared/processed with my Group Leader. He has no idea how close to physical violence I really came.